how old you are
is all the years spent
wishing, waiting, hoping, praying

how young you are
is all the years spent
living

What was intended to be just another ride downtown to grab a couple of beers ended up in over 2 grand parting ways with us because the band in attendance was Soulmate, the blues outfit from Shillong, which I've read so much about on Eve's.

With some very talented musicians and a brilliant lead vocalist (Tipriti 'Tips' Kharbangar I believe her name is) who, when she gets going, sounds like she's got the devil trapped inside her, they sound good - very good. Only problem is they tend to stick to the formula too much if you know what I mean. Because a great bluesman is someone who can take it off the road and still not lose the way. That's what makes you special. Which is why after listening to Soulmate for over two hours last night I'll say they are good but they ain't special. Which doesn't mean they don't have it in them. On the contrary they are one of the best live acts I've heard in a long time.

There's a fine line between the blues and rock n' roll and Soulmate seemed to cross that line quite often. Because when people get up and start dancing you know you've left the blues behind. Coz the blues is music for the soul, not the feet. Or maybe I'm being too harsh. It's always more difficult when you're live in front of a crowd that don't know Albert Collins from Albert King, so maybe that was what was driving their track selection. Which is why I'd love to get my hands on their CD.

They play at the Blue Frog, Sept 30, Mumbai City. Catch them if you can. The girl is awesome - she's like that V12 under the hood - she is the powerhouse! Without her I reckon Soulmate would be nowhere close to the act it is.

***

Thanks for all your comments on the previous post. I especially liked that long one by Scratchpost ... made me laugh. Yeah, those are the kind of ads I'd like to see. Why do people focus so much on looks anyway? Because really it doesn't mean a thing if there is a union of souls.

For Scratchpost - the great John Lee Hooker with Bonnie Raitt. Now this is a song I'd love to hear 'Tips' sing. Coz I tell you man - she can get anyone in the mood!

What if people were really honest when putting out matrimonials. Wouldn't that be - interesting?

Male aged so-and-so working as bla-bla-bla seeks beautiful homely girl with hot sweltering body, experienced in the ancient art of lovemaking, with good culinary skills and well paying job.

End of story. I think women would actually appreciate that. So you may be flooded with calls from various escort agencies offering just that without the hassle of marriage, but still, it's worth a shot wouldn't you say?

Same goes for the women. Why not something like -- Seeking nice gentle man with sober habits and non-philandering ways, having tons of money and no blocked arteries.

I think it'll work, I really do.

***

But on a more serious note - why do people lie? Why would a girl who's dark as the night call herself wheatish, and why would someone with an ass that could hold half the floodwater in Wadala call herself slim? Beats me. Or do they believe that other favourable aspects of themselves which will emerge subsequently would cover up for the bits they lied about. I don't know.

Honesty in these matters is very important I think -- Look honey, I'm an ugly old bastard who can't offer you much - just the love of a good man and a beer on weekends. Or some red wine if you prefer. Plus I'll sing for you when you're blue.

Why not?

Anybody interested you know where to reach me.

***

The Bellamy Brothers ... If I said you had a beautiful body.

I don't know why but I have this great urge to sing this song ... make that get very drunk and sing this song. Anybody game?

***

When the Afreen video came out most men I knew were unanimous on one thing: Lisa Ray was the most gorgeous creature ever to walk this earth. So it made me very sad yesterday to read that she's got an incurable cancer.

A couple of weeks back I met this really nice guy who quit his job in the US so he could be with his wife who is suffering from cancer of the breast. Talking to him I couldn't help being overcome with sympathy, to the point where I felt like giving him a hug and saying hang in there mate. You see, she is only 26.

And Lisa is 37. Not old enough we'd think. But hey, these days it's age no bar. And so it amuses me greatly to see some people planning for their retirement and shit like that. Retirement?? When is that - 58 ... 60?? Not a chance in hell dude! Not unless you're the bludy Queen.

So make the most of today, live it up and make peace with whoever you'd like to see dead. Because they might just kick it sooner than you know!

And know what you would do if you had a million bucks. Not very easy let me tell you. Not unless you happen to be Gujarati ... in which case you'd most likely be thinking about how to turn it into 10 million!




PS: Looking through the comments on Lisa's blog I spotted this one:

"Lisa.. you still have a long way to go. I’ll pray for your recovery in our temple (70 kms from Hyderabad). It’s very powerful deity. I am sure you’ll be normal soon."

What did I tell you about anything being possible in Andhra Pradesh! :)

I'm just thinking: If the Chinks can come in and paint our boulders red supposedly to mark 'their' territory, why can't we do something similar? In a manner that is distinctly Indian, costs nothing, and which will work better than anything else to keep those rotters from the People's Army at bay. Yes I'm talking good ol' Desi turd. Get an entire battalion to do the job on every rock and boulder in that part of our border with China and incursions will end pronto. We may not be able to beat you militarily Great Dragon, but we can certainly give you shit!

***

Kaminey. The ending takes you straight back to one of those crappy movies from the 80's where everyone comes together for one final showdown and anyone who doesn't need to stay alive gets killed. Only reason I went to see it to be honest is because I have developed a deep love for every inch of Priyanka Chopra's body, who these days looks totally ravishing in every role she does. Other than that it was two hours of complete nonsense.

***

Fair bit of shit goin' down in Andhra politics as well from the looks of it. With Sr. Reddy gone and Jr. Reddy not quite ready, poor Sonia appears to be in something of a fix, what with many in the State Cabinet not ready to accept anybody other than a Reddy. I reckon they'd have reinstated the old man's ghost if that were even remotely possible. Weirder things have been known to happen in Andhra Pradesh, so you never can tell.

Quite a shitty post this has turned out to be. Oh well - it's good to clear the system sometimes.

From the TV series Miami Vice, Jan Hammer with Crockett's Theme.

Overheard a girl saying on her phone:

"When will you men realize that I don't know is not an answer!"

***

And I had to smile. Looked at her and smiled. She looked angry. Very angry.

***

But that's how it is with us guys. There are some things we just don't know. It's hard to explain.

***

I smiled because there's this girl I met recently. Pretty much everything I'd be looking for in a girl. Okay so she didn't have that Jessica Alba smile, Angelina lips or Megan Fox body, but what the hell - she was nice. But when someone asked me if I'd want to meet her again I said I don't know. Now saying I don't know usually means you're leaning towards the negative, but in this case I'm pretty much right there in the middle -- I simply do not know.

And so I'm in a bit of a quandary. Because if she calls me I know that's not the answer she wants to hear.

Bette Davis Eyes. No, she didn't have those either.