Skiing. It's a lot harder than it bludy looks, I can tell you that much. First surprise of the day and something that evoked loud laughter from everybody present in the ski rental shop was when I asked Mary - where are the brakes?

Turns out the damn things got no brakes! You have to stop them yourself, using your knees, or legs or whatever the hell you want to. I knew there and then that I was in trouble. Soon I was fitted into boots that left my feet feeling like they'd been placed in concrete blocks. This was definitely not going to be the fun I imagined. Next we were expected to get into a moving cable-car gondola with those damn boots and skis and everything without falling. That done, the most important task was upon me -- getting into the skis, and hopefully skiing. Mary gave me a crash course that would put every other crash course to shame. Sounded easy enough. My plan was to move slowly and then pick up speed once I was more confident. But unfortunately it doesn't quite work like that. When you're a rookie, the slope decides how fast you go, not you. I started moving and before I knew it I was going too fast for comfort (I reckon 25-30 kmph). Suddenly the slope in front looked mighty dangerous. I had to slow down or I'd hurt myself if not anybody else. I tried to get the skis closer together like Mary had told me but nothing doing, I just couldnt slow down; I was a dead man. Then I remembered another thing she had told me - if you can't stop, fall, but don't fall forwards or on your back, you will hurt yourself. Fall sideways. So that is what I did, and goddamn did it hurt. The snow may look all nice and pretty and all, but I tell you it can be quite a bitch when you go down. And then I couldn't get up again. So I had to call for help. And it's not a nice feeling when you're lying there in the snow like a paralysed puppy and a bunch of eight-year-olds go zipping past you in glee. Anyway, Mary helped me up and suggested we try something else - parallel skiing, where we hold hands and ski together like they do in figure skating. Gotta admit that didn't go down very well with my male ego, but what the hell, it was better that getting grievously injured. And it was fun. It kinda felt like those scooters they had in the old days, the ones with the sidecars. She was the scooter, I was the sidecar.



After a couple of rounds of that I'd had enough. There's only so much skiing you can do holding a girls hand. So we decided to try the sledge (exact same kind you see here) ... closer to the ground, and definitely a lot safer. Bullshit! Dangerous as bludy hell. Even more dangerous than skiing at times. So there I was on the sledge hurtling down the slope at God knows how many miles an hour, which was fun ... till you came to a bend. The instructions were simple enough -- to turn right put your right foot down, to go left, the left foot. If only it were that simple. Coz you gotta know just how much and how long to put your bludy foot down. A slight miscalculation and you've swayed too much to the side and before you know it you're lying face down in two feet of snow with your sledge over you or under you or half a mile away from you. Another huge problem was that the slope was not a perfect slope in many places - there were huge ups and downs; which if you're a girl is ok, but if you're a guy could cause some serious damage to your - you know what! So can you imagine me holding the rein with one hand, one hand on my nuts, trying to steer with my feet and having no control over how fast the damn thing was going ... I guess you can.

But Mary said I was very brave ... for someone who'd never been on the snow before. I was actually. Because now when I think about it I could have broken my neck at least a dozen times. I didn't count the number of times I fell, but I know for a fact I was in the snow a lot longer than I was on the skis/sledge.

***

The festive season is really starting to kick in here. At the main station the 50 foot high Swarovski Crystal Christmas tree is a sight to behold.



And that pretty much brings to an end my time here in this beautiful land of mountains, lakes and very stylish women. I wish I had myself a handycam to capture the sights and sounds of Switzerland. No substitute for the real thing of course, but it would have been nice to show the folks back home. This Sunday I return to the sights, the sounds - and the smells - of my beloved homeland.

Van Morrison ... Brown eyed girl. For michelle, who if I remember correctly celebrates her birthday today.

I said to the girl, you gotta be bludy kidding me ... the Blues Brothers at the Rabechilbi in Richterswil! No way!! I mean, are they that popular?

Chilly chilly night it was. But I loved all the lights ... and the music. Called it Diwali - Swiss style. We had a stiff shot of some rum based concoction afterwards. How I love a girl who can stand her poison.

***



More music at the Hauptbahnhof. Never before have I seen so many rocking brass bands ... with so many women playing all kinds of big massive instruments. Forget about foot tapping, these guys actually made you wanna shake your ass ... right there in the middle of the station. Red Hot Chili Peppers, Dylan, Bob Marley, Michael Jackson, Queen, they played it all. I was thrilled I tell you. And here's to the chap who played the lead to Knockin' on Heavens Door (what Slash plays on the GNR version) on his trumpet. You rock dude!





***

It's been snowing cats 'n dogs. Three below zero outside and I'm lovin it. This weekend Mary is taking me skiing. Quite frankly she is more excited than I am. Fotos on Monday. Hope I don't break a leg.

Cheers!

It is snowing outside. And cold as bludy hell. It's about 2 degrees C now and they tell me tomorrows gonna be worse. I can hardly wait.

But I'm holding up better that I imagined. The cold hasn't got to me like it has most of the others. Even the locals seem to be freezing their balls off. The other evening I took a walk down the street in my shorts and T shirt (...and rubber chappals!) and people were looking at me like I was an an alien or something. So the colds not such a problem for me ... it's the icy winds like the kind we're having today that can be a bummer.

Two weeks from today I'll be getting ready to leave for home. Mixed feelings really. On the one hand I am happy to have seen some of the most breathtakingly beautiful sights in the world and on the other I want to go back to those faces I miss so much. But I know that in a little while I'd want to go away again. Somewhere else. I guess that's how it'll always be with me.

***

Last Sunday was spent in Fribourg and Gruyere. Fribourg -- the city was a treat for the senses. I've been to every major Swiss city over the past month but none had as captivated as this medieval town. So much history, so well preserved.



The city is predominantly Catholic, and it shows. Don't get me wrong but there's something about us Catholics that the Prodys just don't have. You go to a Prody Church and you wanna get out in 5 minutes. But go to the Cathedral of Saint Nicholas and you can sit there for hours and hours just staring in amazement at everything around you. Lucky for me the choir was in practice and the sounds of a 300 year old pipe organ descended on us like a soothing balm.



Looking back, it was a perhaps a good thing we went on a Sunday when the tourist office was closed. Which will tell you - this is not a place you'll get to see with SOTC or Cox & Kings. Not a single - not even one Asian tourist. And I gotta tell you those Chinks with their SLR cameras are a lot worse than all the others. I experienced that first hand in the revolving cable car going up to Titlus. The minute the damn thing started to revolve, the morons started jumping up and down in excitement like children and babbling away in that goddamned language ... so much so you'd think they'd just been offered free sex for life.





And since the tourist office was closed, we were on our own. No maps, no list of places to see, nothing. Yup, I went totally unprepared. But for a guy like me it doesn't really matter. So far whenever I've gone to a place unprepared, I've ended up being pleasantly surprised by what I discovered. And in Fribourg I decided to take a little trail through the woods not knowing where it would lead, and voila, I ended up seeing parts of the city most people would miss, not to mention saving at least an hour had I taken the main road. Which goes to show you it pays to be adventurous.

***



After Fribourg it was Gruyere - the famous cheese village. Damn, I should have taken her photo ... she was the sweetest looking thing having her coffee when I went up to her in the restaurant near Fribourg station and asked if she'd help me get to Gruyere. And looking at the way she struggled with her English interspersed with French, I know it must have been quite an effort. But if it wasn't for her I'd have missed the 4 pm last entry into the Chateau ... made it with 5 minutes to spare. Going all that way and not getting to see it would have a tragedy. And that's another thing. I've been very lucky here in Switzerland - with the weather, which was just right whenever we went somewhere, and with many other things I won't go into now.

***

People are already starting to get into the festive mood here. And back in India I know the festvities - and the noise - are on in full blast.

Bob Dylan ... Like a rolling stone.